Vivek...Ma Prem Nirvano...Christine Wolf Smith aka Alexa/Alisha Alexander

 "I had a girlfriend when I was young. Then she died. But on her deathbed, she promised me she would come back. And she has come back. The name of the girlfriend was Shashi. She died in '47. She was the daughter of a certain doctor in my village, Dr Sharma. He is also dead now. And now she has come as Vivek to take care of me. Vivek cannot remember it. I used to call Shashi Gudiya, and I started calling Vivek Gudiya also, just to give continuity.
Life is a great drama, a great play—it goes on from one life to another to another."
The Path of Love, ch 1

FOR DAYS NOW I HAVE BEEN ON FIRE INSIDE. I FEEL THE UNKNOWN IN PART OF ME, AND I AM AFRAID TO JUMP.

OSHO,

FOR DAYS NOW I HAVE BEEN ON FIRE INSIDE. I FEEL THE UNKNOWN IN PART OF ME, AND
I AM AFRAID TO JUMP. EVERYTHING IS CUCKOO, AND IT'S BEAUTIFUL AND SCARY AT THE
SAME TIME.

PUSH ME, OSHO!

ON FIRE.....<3

Vivek,

CRAZY, BABY, CRAZY! That's what I am here for, to put you on fire. And once it starts happening, nothing else is needed to be done. Then it goes on growing by itself, in spite of all your fears; they cannot prevent the fire. They are natural - they come from your past, but the past is impotent when it confronts the present. The fire is present, the fire is now, and the fears come from the past; they are already dead. They belong to the non-existential, and the non-existential cannot do anything to the existential.

They are like darkness. The darkness can be very old, ancient, millions of years old, but just a small candle is enough to dispel it. It cannot say, "I am very ancient, so how you can dare? You are just a small candle and you have come into existence this very moment, and I am so old, so ancient."

But there is no time for darkness to say all that. The moment the candle is lit, the darkness starts disappearing. The problem is how to light the candle; once it is there, then there is no problem at all. If the candle is not there then darkness is very real, too real - although it exists not. It is only an absence.

Vivek, once the fire is inside, even just a small part of you is on fire, that will do - it will spread. It is not a fire that dies. Once it is there it is going to consume you totally; that is inevitable.

My work ends the moment the fire is on. Then the fire will do...

You say: FOR DAYS NOW I HAVE BEEN ON FIRE INSIDE. I FEEL THE UNKNOWN IN PART OF ME, AND I AM AFRAID TO JUMP.

It is natural to be afraid to jump. And to jump in fire is like killing yourself In a sense it is suicide: the ego is going to die. Hence the fear, because we have existed as an ego; that is our identity. To drop it means death. The mind cannot conceive what else will be left once the ego is gone. The mind knows only the ego; it knows nothing behind, beyond. It knows nothing of the transcendental. The mind is part of the ego, and when the ego starts dying the mind starts dying, and it creates all kinds of fears, anxieties. It is just self-defence.

But once the fire is on, the mind is finished. It may take a little while for the fire to spread to the whole jungle of your being, but the mind cannot do anything to prevent it.

The moment the mind becomes impotent, the work of the Master is finished. Then he simply watches. Then he enjoys the disappearance of your ego, your mind, your whole so-called personality.

You say, Vivek: EVERYTHING IS CUCKOO.

In the beginning, it will look like that, because the mind is our logic and the fire is going to destroy our logic - because life is more than logic. In fact, life is illogical; it has to be because it contains contradictions. Logic is a choice; you go on choosing that which is consistent with your idea. Life is far more than that.

If you believe that life consists only of days, then you will ignore the nights. You will not take any note of the nights because they will create confusion. Then what will happen to your idea, your prejudice, that life consists of only of days? You have to cling to your idea; the nights seem so be confusing.

You have to deny, you have to keep close to the nights. You have to say they are illusory, they are dream-stuff, they are unreal; the real is the day. This is how the mind tries to be consistent and logical.

If it accepts the night, then the logic starts disappearing. then the contradiction has happened, then the consistency is lost.

If you accept only the flowers or only the thorns you will avoid the opposite, and life consists of polar opposites. Life cannot be consistent, remember it; only death is consistent. Hence logic is more in tune with death than in tune with life. Life is vast, it is so vast it can easily take in the contradictory; in fact, it rejoices in contradictions. On the same rose bush, it grows flowers and thorns. How can it be logical? Logic will say, "Either grow thorns or grow flowers."

Logic means either/or, and life means both/and. Hence the moment the mind starts slipping, dying, one feels as if one is going mad.

In the East we have continuously observed the phenomenon; we call it a kind of spiritual madness.

In Bengal the mystics have been called Bauls; BAUL means the mad one. In the Sufi tradition, the mystic is called a MAST; MAST means a mad one. And Jesus, Bahauddin, Francis, Eckhart, Kabir, Chuang Tzu, these are all mad people - for the simple reason because they have not chosen; they have accepted life as it is in its totality.

Science up to the time of Albert Einstein remained very consistent, very logical. Albert Einstein is the first mystic in the world of science; a scientific mysticism he introduced, and he disturbed the whole edifice of the old science. After Albert Einstein, science, particularly physics which was his field of work, is no more the same - because he accepted contradictions. In fact, he said that "When I had started my work I had thought that life and logic are synonymous - my work was to solve problems logically - but as I went deeper I became aware that life is not synonymous with logic: it contains contradictions. And in fact, because of those contradictions, it is beautiful, because of those contradictions it has a certain tension; that tension gives it aliveness, it gives it possibilities to be dynamic, moving."

And at the end of his life, he said, "Now I cannot say that life is a problem. To call life a problem is a logical statement because a problem means something that can be solved through logic, if not today then tomorrow. Sooner or later logic will find a way and the problem will be dissolved."

Einstein said, just two days before he died that, "Life is no more a problem for me, it is a mystery."

And the difference between mystery and problem is immense, qualitative. A problem can be solved logically; a mystery cannot be solved logically or in any other way. A mystery has to be lived, accepted as it is; there is no way to solve it. Life is a mystery; it is a mystery because it is contradictory. And thousands of contradictions are there, but those contradictions give it variety, vastness.

So in the beginning when the mind starts losing its grip upon you, it feels as if one is going cuckoo. But to be a cuckoo is really far more beautiful than to be a pundit, a professor, a theologian, a priest, a politician. Have you not heard the distant call of the cuckoo, how beautiful it is? And cuckoo is crazy!

The beauty of the cuckoo's song is transcendental. It should not be so - looking at the mundane life, looking at the ordinary life. The cuckoo goes on singing as if it lives in another world.

My sannyasins ALL have to be cuckoos! They have to learn the song: the Song of Solomon, the song of love, life, laughter.

The only thing beautiful in the Old Testament is the Song of Solomon; everything else is ordinary. Of course, Jews and Christians are very much embarrassed by the Song of Solomon; they would like it not to be in the Old Testament. It does not look religious: it praises life, it is very fleshy, it is very alive. It praises love - it is sheer poetry. But they cannot deny it - it is there. All that they can do is either ignore it or give it some esoteric meanings, which are all nonsense.

It is a very simple song; it is not a parable and it is not metaphorical. It is very direct, immediate. It says exactly what it says; it is like two plus two are four.

Vivek, read the Song of Solomon - it will help your inner fire. It is one of the greatest documents in the world, one of the most beautiful. Even the Bhagavad Gita, compared to the Song of Solomon, has not that beauty. It sings the song of the earth; it is rejoicing in the ordinary. And the moment you rejoice in the ordinary you transform the ordinary.

There are two things in the Old Testament: one is the Song of Solomon and the other are the Ten Commandments. About the Ten Commandments, Vivek, remember this:

Two men were wrangling vehemently about something when one of them said, "The trouble with you, Bill, is that you don't agree with anybody on anything. I'll bet you don't even accept the Ten Commandments."

"That's not true," disagreed the other. "If you make only one small change in them I'll agree with all of them."

"That's certainly surprising," said the first man. "What's the small change you want to be made?"

"Just strike out the word 'not' all the way through."

And that's what the Song of Solomon is: the small word "not" has been struck out all the way through.

And you ask me, Vivek: PUSH ME, OSHO! ON FIRE...

That I am doing without ever taking anybody's permission! I never come from the front door because nobody would allow me from the front door. I never knock, I never ask, "May I come in, sir or madam?" I enter like a thief, I enter from the back door. And certainly, I have to enter like a thief because you are asleep; knocking on the door won't help. You will rationalize in your sleep, "It must be the wind, or an aeroplane passing by, or something else." You will rationalize, turn over, go under the blanket and start dreaming again. Maybe knocking on the door can trigger a few dreams in you; that's all it will do. You are so fast asleep, I have to come from the back door.

In India we have one thousand names of God; one whole scripture is devoted just only to the names.

Nothing else is written in that scripture: Vishnu Sahasranam - One Thousand Names of God. Just names are counted from one to one thousand. The most beautiful name that I love is Hari; Hari means the ultimate thief.

Just two days ago I was giving sannyasa to a beautiful sannyasin. I have given her the name Haridasi - surrendered to the ultimate thief And when I told her that, "Your heart is stolen," for a moment she was transported into another world. Her hand suddenly went on her heart and I said, "It is not there!"

And she understood the point immediately. She lost a few heartbeats; tears of joy came to her eyes.

She could not speak a single word; her voice was choked. It is bound to happen when your heart is gone!

I go on doing things in my own way. And with you, Vivek, I am not worried. You are on fire, your heart is stolen long before. And I am pushing you, and I am absolutely certain that the thing that you are all here for is going to happen to you. Fortunately, you are not a Polack, otherwise, there was a danger...

Have you heard about the new Polish parachutes?

They open on impact... but they are having great difficulty with them because most Polacks miss the ground!

. And when love is prayer, you have found the soulmate.

Nobody is a means for your purposes. Respect - love is a sharing, it is not using the other, it is not trying to snatch something from the other. On the contrary, it is giving wholeheartedly for no reason at all, just for the sheer joy of giving.

And then suddenly you will find one day you have found someone with whom your energies are in harmony, in accord. And it is a beautiful experience even to find a single person with whom you are in accord.

Then love reaches its highest peak. It is no more sexual, it is pure prayer. And when love is prayer, you have found the soulmate.

But if your love is lust you can't find a soulmate, you can only find some woman's body.

And the body is not going to help fulfil your longing. You need attunement with the soul, with the inner being, with the interiority of the woman or of the man. At least with one person if it happens, great joy arises.

~ Osho - Book: Dhammapada, Volume 7

That is the real prison.

There are people who cannot understand that happiness is possible in any way other than sex. There are people who cannot understand that there is any bliss beyond sex. There are people who cannot understand that there is any happiness except in food. There are people who cannot understand that there is any happiness except in big houses, big cars, much money, power and prestige. It is impossible to understand beyond your own standpoint - people remain confined within their own standpoints. That is the real prison.

If you want a synthesis you have to drop all the imprisonments, you have to drop out of your cages. They are very subtle cages and you have decorated them for a long time; you may have even started loving them. You may have forgotten completely that they are prisons; you may have started thinking that they are your home.

But if you have lived with this wall for too long, if the mind has become accustomed to it, you think of it as a protection, as a shelter, as security. And then you look at other people; from your cell in the prison, you look outside. Your presence in the cell corrupts your vision.

Come out under the sky and under the stars - and synthesis will take care of itself. You are simply to go beyond these standpoints. Move to the transcendental and there is synthesis.

~ Osho - Book: The Art of Dying

“Don’t be worried. Even if you want to live, you will not be able to.”

Look at Vivek, who has been with me longest — for fifteen years.

When she first came, she was only twenty;
now she is thirty-five. Almost half of her life she has been with me.

And she has served me with an immense
devotion, love, care, such that you can only find in ancient stories about women, not in reality.

From the morning when I wake up, till at night when I go to sleep, she is running all around. She has no time of her own, every moment she is devoted.

Just to serve me is her joy.

Vivek, again and again, says to me,
“I don’t want to live a single moment when you are gone.”

And I say to her,
“Don’t be worried. Even if you want to live, you will not be able to.”

Just the other day, Deeksha was saying to Vivek,

“Once Osho is gone, I am gone.”

That is true.
~ Osho

Если вы знаете, в чем смысл веры?

Если вы знаете, в чем смысл веры? Вера рождается в неведении. Если вы знаете, то вы знаете. И хорошо, если вы не знаете и знаете, что вы не знаете. Вера может ввести вас в заблуждение. Вера может породить в вашем уме такое недоразумение, что, не зная, вы начинаете думать, что вы знаете. Вера не есть доверие, и чем тверже вы заявляете о своей тотальной вере, тем больше вы опасаетесь внутренних сомнений.

Доверие не знает сомнений. Вера — это подавление сомнения; это желание. Когда вы говорите: «Я верю в Бога», вы заявляете: «Я не могу жить без Бога. Будет слишком трудно существовать во тьме, в окружении смерти, без понятия Бога». Это понятие спасительно. Вы не чувствуете себя одиноким, вы не чувствуете себя незащищенным, сомневающимся — отсюда вера.
Мартин Лютер писал: «Мой Бог — моя лучшая крепость». Эти слова не могут исходить от человека, который доверяет. «Мой Бог — моя лучшая крепость»? Похоже, Мартин Лютер обороняется от кого-то. Даже Бог стал крепостью, чтобы защитить вас, чтобы вы могли чувствовать себя в безопасности — это вера из страха. Представление «Бог — это моя лучшая крепость» рождается из страха, не из любви. Не из доверия. Глубоко внутри — сомнение и страх.

Доверять просто. Это как ребенок, доверяющий своей матери. Это не значит, что он верит, вера еще не проникла в него. Вы некогда были маленьким ребенком. Вы верили в свою мать или доверяли ей? Сомнения еще не появились, поэтому как можно говорить о вере? Вера приходит только тогда, когда появляются сомнения; сомнение приходит первым. Позже, чтобы подавить сомнения, вы цепляетесь за веру. Доверие есть, когда исчезают сомнения; доверие есть, когда нет сомнений.

Например, вы дышите. Вы вдыхаете, затем выдыхаете. Вы боитесь выдохнуть из-за того, что — а вдруг? — дыхание не возобновится? Вы доверяете. Вы доверяете, что оно вернется. Разумеется, оснований доверять ему нет. Какие основания? Почему оно должно возвращаться? В лучшем случае, вы можете сказать, что в прошлом происходило так, но это не гарантия. В будущем это может не случиться. Если вы будете бояться выдыхать, потому что дыхание может не вернуться, вы начнете задерживать его. Вот что значит верить — цепляться, задерживать. Но если вы задерживаете дыхание, ваше лицо багровеет, и вы начинаете задыхаться. Если будете продолжать — умрете.

Все вероисповедания душат, все вероисповедания не дают вам быть по-настоящему живыми. Они умерщвляют ваше существо.

Вы выдыхаете, вы доверяете жизни. Буддистское слово нирвана означает просто выдох, выдыхание, доверие. Доверие — это очень, очень невинное явление. Вера из головы, доверие из сердца. Просто доверяйте жизни, потому что вы из жизни, живете в жизни и однажды снова вернетесь к ее источнику. Страха нет. Вы родились, вы живете, вы умрете; в этом нет ничего страшного. Вы снова родитесь, снова будете жить, снова умрете; это круг. Та жизнь, которая дала жизнь вам, всегда может дать вам другую жизнь — чего бояться?

Зачем цепляться за веру? Вера создана человеком, доверие — Богом. Вера в любом проявлении философична, доверие не имеет ничего общего с философией. Доверие означает, что вы знаете, что такое любовь. Это не понятие Бога, сидящего где-то на небесах, управляющего и руководящего оттуда. Доверию не нужен Бог: этой беспредельной жизни, этой тотальности более чем достаточно.

Ошо

MEDITATION FOR ALL MANKIND

UNIVERSAL MEDITATION

MEDITATION FOR ALL MANKIND

Universal Meditation is a natural method to place the human soul in conscious contact with God, who is within man and permeates the entire cosmos. According to the Scriptures of the major religions and the Masters of the Highest Order, God manifests Himself through the two primary forms of Celestial Light and Sound.

Meditation gives peace and quiet against the stresses of everyday life and opens the door to the deepest and divine part of ourselves.

When the Divine Power manifests, it assumes the primary form of Celestial Light and Sound:

"Suddenly from the sky came a potent sound like the wind that filled the whole house they were in. And upon their heads appeared tongues of fire that divided and rested upon each one of them. And all of them were filled with the Holy Ghost." - Pentecost, Acts of the Apostles 2:2-4

"Within you is the Light and within the Light is the Sound. And they shall lead you to God." - Nanak (Founder of the Sikh religion, 1469-1538)

"The creative Word of God, or God into expression Power, manifests Itself as Light and Sound Principles." - Sant Kirpal Singh (Master of spirituality and President of the World Fellowship of Religions, 1894–1974)

Since Celestial Light and Sound emanate from the plane of pure Divinity (the House of the Father, Superior Paradise, Immutable Permanence, Sat Lokh, Sach Khand, as it is called in the different religious traditions), entering in contact with them and following them toward their Source, one returns without fail to God, reaching liberation or salvation. It is a practical realization that the Masters have always invited human beings to realize during their lifetime.

WHY IS IT CALLED UNIVERSAL MEDITATION?    https://schoolofspirituality.org/universal-meditation/

Who is real friend?

Satyam Asks: I have many friends, but the question: who is a real friend? This always arises in my mind. Will you say something about it?

Osho: Satyam, you are asking from the wrong end. Never ask, "Who is my real friend?" Ask, "Am I a real friend to somebody?" That is the right question. Why are you worried about others - whether they are friends to you or not?

The proverb is: A friend in need is a friend indeed. But deep down that is greed! That is not friendship, that is not love.  You want to use the other as a means, and no man is a means, every man is an end unto himself.  Why are you so worried about who is a real friend?

A young honeymoon couple were touring Southern Florida. They stopped at a rattlesnake farm along the road. After seeing the sights they engaged in small talk with the man that handled the snakes.

"Gosh!" exclaimed the young bride, "You certainly have a dangerous job! Don't you ever get bitten by the snakes?"

"Yes, I do," answered the handler.

"Well", she insisted, "just what do you do when you are bitten by a snake?

"I always carry a razor-sharp knife in my pocket, and as soon as I am bitten I make a deep, criss-cross mark across the fang wound and then suck the poison from the wound."

"What? Ah! what would happen if you were to accidentally sit on a rattler?" persisted the bride.

"Ma'am," answered the snake handler, "that will be the day I learn who my real friends are!"

Why are you worried?

The real question has to be: Am I friendly to people? Do you know what friendship is? It is the highest form of love. In love, some lust is bound to be there; in friendship, all lust disappears. In friendship nothing gross remains, it becomes absolutely subtle.

It is not the question of using the other, it is not even a question of needing the other, it is a question of sharing. You have too much, and you would like to share. And whosoever is ready to share your joy with you, your dance, your song, you will be grateful to him, you will feel obliged. Not that he'/she is obliged to you, not that he should be thankful to you because you have given so much to him. A friend never thinks in that way. A friend always feels grateful to those people who allow him to love them, to give them whatsoever he has got.

Love is greed. You will be surprised to know that the English word 'love' comes from a Sanskrit word Lobh; lobh means greed. How lobh became love is a strange story. In Sanskrit it is greed; the original root means greed. And love as we know it is really nothing but greed masquerading as love - it is hidden greed.

    

Satyam, making friendship with the idea of using people is a wrong step from the very beginning. 

Friendship has to be sharing. If you have something, share it - and whosoever is ready to share with you, is a friend. It is not a question of need. It is not a question that when you are in danger the friend has to come to your aid. That is irrelevant - he may come, he may not come, but if he doesn't come, you don't have any complaint. If he comes, you are grateful, but if he doesn't come, it's perfectly okay. It is his decision to come or not to come. You don't want to manipulate him, you don't want to make him feel guilty. You will not have any grudge. You will not say to him that, "When I was in need you didn't turn up -  what kind of friend are you?"

Friendship is not something of the marketplace. Friendship is one of those rare things which belong to the temple and not to the shop. But if you are not aware of that kind of friendship, you will have to learn it.

Mohammedans say that if you die in a religious war, 'Jihad', you will immediately go to heaven and all your sins are forgiven. And Christians also say that in a religious war, in a crusade, if you die, you will immediately go to heaven; then everything else is forgiven. And millions of people have died and killed others, believing that this is a truth.

We have seen such things happening in the recent past, in the twentieth century; it doesn't seem to be very grown-up in that way. Adolph Hitler repeated for twenty years that "Jews are the cause of all misery," and a very intelligent nation like Germany started believing in him. What to say about ordinary people? - Even people like Martin Heidegger, one of the greatest philosopher Germany has produced in this century, believed that Adolph Hitler was right. He supported Adolph Hitler.

A man of the intelligence of Martin Heidegger, supporting a stupid, mad person like Adolph Hitler! What must the secret be? The secret is: repeat, go on repeating. Even Jews started believing that it must be true: "We must be the cause; otherwise how could so many intelligent people believe it? If so many people believe it, there must be something in it!"

You should have been brought up with such beliefs, such ideas, which have no foundation in reality. And if you go on living according to them, you will live in vain. You have to go through a radical change.

Ask a question about yourself, don't ask about others. It is impossible to be certain of the other, and there is no need either. How can you be certain of the other? The other is a flux. This moment the other person may be loving, and the next moment he may not be loving. There can be no promise. You can only be certain about yourself and that too only for the moment. There is no need to think of the whole future. Think in terms of the moment and the present. Live in the present.

If this moment is full of friendship and the fragrance of friendship, why be worried about the next moment? The next moment will be born out of this moment. It is bound to be of a higher, deeper quality. It will bring the same fragrance to a higher altitude. There is no need to think about it - just live the moment in deep friendship.

Friendship need not be addressed to anyone in particular; that is also a rotten idea, that you have to be friends with a certain person - just be friendly. Rather than creating friendship, create friendliness. Let it be a quality of your being, a climate that surrounds you, so you are friendly with whomsoever you come in contact.

This whole existence has to be befriended! And if you can befriend existence, existence will befriend you a thousandfold. It returns you in the same coin but multiplied. It echoes you. If you throw a stone at existence, you will get back many more stones. If you throw flowers, flowers will come back.

Life is a mirror, it reflects your face. Be friendly, and all of life will reflect friendliness. People know perfectly well that if you are friendly to a dog even the dog becomes friendly to you, so friendly. And there are people who have known that if you become friendly to a tree, the tree becomes friendly to you.

Try great experiments in friendship, Try with a rosebush, and see the miracle: slowly slowly, it will happen because man has not been behaving with trees in a friendly way; hence, they have become very afraid.

But now scientist says that, when you come with an axe to cut down a tree, even before you have started cutting it, the trees go into a shiver, a cold shiver. It goes into a great fear of panic. You have not even started, but just the intention - it is as if the tree becomes aware of your intention! Now they have sophisticated instruments just like cardiographs, which can make graphs on paper showing what the tree is feeling. When the tree is feeling joyous, there is a rhythm in the graph; when the tree is feeling afraid, the fear is shown on the graph. When the tree sees a friend coming it rejoices, it jumps, it dances; the graph immediately shows a dance. When the tree sees the Gardner coming.........

Have you ever said hello to a tree? Try it, and one day you will be surprised: the tree also says hello in its tongue, in its own language. Hug a tree, and one day will come soon when you will feel that it was not only you who was hugging the tree - the tree was responding, you were also hugged by the tree, although the tree has no hands. But it has its own way of expressing its joy, its sadness, its anger, its fear.

The whole existence is sensitive. That's what I mean when I say that existence is God.

Be friendly, Satyam, and don't be worried whether anybody is friendly towards you or not - that is a businesslike question. Why be worried?   Why not transform the whole existence into a friend towards you? Why miss such a great kingdom? Osho                  

Consciousness

Consciousness
I want human beings to understand that they have the capacity to fall in their consciousness to the lowest level or they can rise to the highest pinnacle of consciousness.

Anxiety is a deep problem... The problem is schizophrenia. ~OSHO~

You don't know how to do a thing totally, and this is THE BASIC MADNESS OF HUMANITY: everybody is divided.
DIVIDED, HOW CAN YOU ENJOY? Divided, how can you celebrate? One part of you goes on against you continuously -- as if one of your legs goes to the right and the other leg goes to the left. You are standing on two boats which are moving in different directions, diametrically opposite. THIS IS YOUR ANXIETY.
So many people come to me and they say, 'HOW TO GET RID OF ANXIETY?' They don't know what this word 'anxiety' implies. They think that something like transcendental meditation will do: just by chanting a mantra their anxiety will go. They are simply stupid. Things like transcendental meditation have appeal because of the stupidity of people -- because they are in search of shortcuts, something easily done ... like instant coffee: you do it -- finished!
ANXIETY IS A DEEP PROBLEM. The problem is schizophrenia. You are divided, CONSTANTLY FIGHTING WITH YOURSELF. You are two, not one, and this tension creates anxiety. Now, this repeating of a mantra is not going to be of any help. It may give you a little deeper sleep, it may help you to be a little more together, but it is not going to help far enough. Your division remains, and sooner or later again you realize that now the trick is not working.
The schizophrenia has to be dropped in a deep understanding. DON'T FIGHT WITH YOURSELF. And always remember that the top-dog is wrong. Always remember that the natural is truer. WHENEVER THERE IS A CONFLICT, FOLLOW THE NATURAL. If there is a conflict between love and celibacy, follow love -- and go totally in it. I know one-day celibacy arises, but that comes out of a deep experience of love. Brahmacharya arises, but this is the flowering of profound love -- love felt so deeply it becomes brahmacharya; it becomes innocence, it becomes virginity.
VIRGINITY HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THE BODY; it has to do with profound love. You call a woman a virgin because she has not made love yet. I don't call her a virgin. I CALL A WOMAN VIRGIN WHO HAS TRANSCENDED LOVE; who has loved so deeply that the very depth has become a transcendence.
I CALL A MAN VIRGIN WHO HAS LOVED DEEPLY, and through love has become so one that now there is no need -- no need to depend on the other. He feels grateful towards the other because the other has helped him to become so independent. VIRGINITY IS NOT IN THE BEGINNING; IT IS IN THE END. Children are not a virgin. They are just waiting to be violated.
I have heard:
"Three children were sitting on the steps of a home, and one child was playing with toy motorcars, another was playing with a spaceship, and the third was reading a glossy Playboy-type magazine. A man passed. He looked at the three children. He asked the first, 'What you would like to become in your life?' The first said, 'Of course, I would like to compete in car races. I want to become the greatest driver in the world.' The second said, 'I want to become an astronaut.' And he asked the third, 'What do you want to become?' He looked at the man and said, 'Grown up, sir. Grown-up.'
CHILDREN ARE NOT VIRGIN. They are just waiting to become grown-up. In fact, they are worried why it is taking so long, why it is being delayed.
I was reading the autobiography of a poet, and when he was a child, he must have been about eleven, he came under the influence of a Christian missionary. And he became very impressed by the Christian doctrine that soon the world is going to end and Jesus will come, the second coming. But he became very much afraid. He started praying that, 'God, wait for a little. Let my virginity be broken, violated. Wait for a little! -- just two or three years more. Don't finish the world so soon!'

Children are not a virgin. In fact, CHILDREN ARE NOT INNOCENT -- THEY JUST LOOK IT. They are getting ready to be corrupted. They are getting ready to move into the world.

REAL INNOCENCE COMES ONLY IN THE END. It is a flowering; it is not a seed. It is not the beginning; it is the end.
IF LOVE IS FULFILLED, BRAHMACHARYA ARISES. If you have lived totally in anger, compassion comes. If you have moved in life, suddenly you have a transcending experience. But the old religions, all of them have created a divided mind, a guilty mind, a crazy mind -- split. 
OSHO
Nirvana: The Last Nightmare
Ch #1: Mastered by Zen